1 of 1- Bog End Ultra
- Bog End Yoda
Offline - From: Under The Thumb in Kingston
- Registered: 08/4/2013
- Posts: 1,933
The funniest thing I heard at Sandy Lane
The thing that tickled me about this episode was that unlike the incident with the old codger at Wembley, this particular verbal assault was entirely unprovoked, unless you count representing Dulwich Hamlet provocation enough.
It was Christmas time, probably Boxing Day and the Sandy Lane playing surface made Derby's old Baseball Ground pitch look like a bowling green. It must have been p***ing down for weeks prior to the match as each tackle cut a deep furrow and with every passing tackle the pitch began to resemble a ploughed field. I was stood in the terraced enclosure in front of the magnificent old main stand next to a group of Tooting fans. The accoustics under the roof of that old stand were fantastic and could easily increase the volume of any verbals tenfold, it could make whispering Bob Harris sound like Brian Blessed.
A cheating wimp of a Dulwich player is rolling around on the ground feigning injury and the ref has been suitably conned to stop play and summon the Dulwich physio to administer the magic sponge. When she emerged from the dugout ( female physios were a rarity back in the 80's ) there was a collective intake of breath from the crowd, not because of her gender but because of her physique......she was huge, what can only be described as 'a unit'. Some women have 'child bearing hips' where as these could have given ample support to the Clifton Suspension Bridge. As often happens in non-league football when there is a break in play a hush descended upon Sandy Lane. The Dulwich physiotherapist ( the most unlikeliest specimen of sports science expertise you'll see in your life ) runs/waddles/plods/ploughs her way towards her stricken colleague. The silence is broken by one of the Tooting fans in the group next to me.....................
'' OI, GET OFF OUR PITCH..........YOU'LL F****ING RUIN IT YOU FAT COW !!!! '' I p***ed myself laughing.
Does anybody else out there remember the incident, late 80's im guessing. If you were within a 1/2 mile radius of Sandy Lane that day you would've heard him, trust me.